What Is an Obituary: Definition, Purpose, and Example (2024)

An obituary is a notice of a person’s death, typically featuring a brief biographical sketch. This announcement is commonly published in newspapers and online to inform the community of the individual’s passing.

The term “obituary” can also be referred to by its synonyms, such as “necrology” or, more informally, “obit.”

What Is an Obituary for?

An obituary serves multiple purposes:

• It informs the public of a person’s death and acts as a focal point for the community to begin the grieving process. Sharing the loss with the community can significantly lighten the burden of grief, as it opens up channels for emotional support and connection at a time when you might feel most isolated.
• It offers family and friends a way to remember and honor the person who has passed away. An obituary goes beyond the basic facts such as age and dates of significant life events; it highlights what made the deceased stand out and how they lived a life worth remembering.
• It announces any forthcoming funeral or memorial service details.
• It acts as a historical record that can be invaluable for genealogy research, providing jumping-off points that help family members trace their roots and understand their heritage.

While writing an obituary is a common and traditional practice, it is a personal choice and not required by Federal or any state law. Some families may choose to forgo an obituary for various reasons, including privacy concerns or personal preferences.

Who Writes an Obituary?

Common writers of an obituary can include:

• A close family member or friend. They are intimately familiar with the deceased and can share personal details and anecdotes that capture the essence of the loved one’s life. Additionally, writing the obituary can serve as a therapeutic process, helping family members begin their journey through grief by reflecting on and celebrating the life of their loved one.
• A funeral or memorial service provider. In some cases, family members or friends may not feel comfortable or capable of writing an obituary due to the emotional difficulty of the task or a lack of confidence in their writing skills. When this happens, it’s common for funeral homes to step in and provide assistance. Funeral home staff are experienced in crafting obituaries and can help by interviewing family members to gather important details.
• A commissioned writer. These writers are experienced in writing obituaries with skills to craft a compelling and respectful narrative. Commissioned writers work closely with the family to ensure that the obituary accurately reflects the life and personality of the deceased. This approach can be helpful when the family wishes to capture complex life stories or desires a particularly polished and memorable obituary.
• The deceased. Some individuals choose to write their own obituary before their death. This allows them to have control over how they are remembered and ensures that their life story is told in their own words. Writing one’s own obituary can be a reflective and meaningful exercise, as it offers a unique opportunity to summarize one’s life experiences, achievements, and values from a personal perspective. It can also alleviate some burdens on family members during a difficult time.

How to Write an Obituary

Obituaries are not legal documents like last wills; therefore, they can vary greatly in style, tone, content, or even length [1] . However, a typical obituary contains the following components in order:

Step 1: Death Announcement

This is usually one short paragraph that includes:

• The full name of the deceased, potentially including a well-known nickname;
• Their age at the time of death;
• The city of their residence;
• The date and place of death; and
• The cause of death (if appropriate).

Some families opt for straightforward language like “died” while others may choose softer expressions such as “passed away” or “left us”.

Step 2: A Short Biography

The biography can be as short or long as one wishes. It should encapsulate significant life milestones and the personality of the deceased.

Start with the date and place of birth, followed by the deceased person’s life events such as career achievements or personal hobbies. Instead of simply listing their accomplishments, take the opportunity to celebrate their life. Consider talking about the following to make the obituary heartfelt and sincere:

• Personal Stories and Anecdotes: Include heartwarming or humorous anecdotes that highlight the unique aspects of the deceased’s character. For example, if they were known for their generosity, share a story about a time they went out of their way to help someone in need.
• Impact on Others: Describe the positive impact they had on the lives of others. This could include mentorship, volunteer work, or simply being a cherished friend and confidant. Mention specific examples, like how they mentored a colleague at work or regularly volunteered at a local shelter.
• Passions and Interests: Reflect on their passions and interests. If they had a love for gardening, talk about their favorite plants or how they turned their backyard into a beautiful oasis. If they were passionate about cooking, describe their signature dish that everyone looked forward to at family gatherings.
• Achievements: Infuse the narrative with emotion and context when discussing their achievements. Rather than just stating they won an award, explain what it meant to them and how it reflected their dedication and hard work.
• Quotes and Sayings: Use quotes or sayings that were significant to them or that they frequently used. This personal touch can bring their voice into the obituary and provide comfort to those reading it.
• Legacy: Highlight the legacy they leave behind. This can be in the form of children, projects they initiated, or their lasting impressions on their community. Discuss how their values and lessons will continue to influence others.

Engage in conversations with family members and close friends to gather unique stories and insights. This collaborative approach enriches the obituary with personal anecdotes and details that might otherwise be overlooked.

In addition, ensure that all information, such as names, dates, and significant life events, is factual and correct. Double-check these details with close family members and friends to avoid any errors.

Step 3: List of Surviving Family Members

This section recognizes family and serves as a record for future genealogical research.

The list of surviving family members should be organized in the order of closest relation as follows:

• The spouse;
• The children and their spouses’ names in parenthesis (e.g., Mark (Sarah) Smith);
• The grandchildren;
• The great-grandchildren;
• Parents; and
• Siblings.

You may also mention family members who have already passed away.

Step 4: A Special Message or Photos

Some families conclude the obituary by inviting people to make donations to any charities or causes important to the deceased.

Additionally, include a special message or a short prayer if desired. Photos are a touching addition, providing a visual reminder of the loved one. Choose a recent picture along with other meaningful photos from different stages of their life.

Step 5: Memorial Service Arrangements or Funeral Details

Include the date, time, and location of the service, and if applicable, information about the wake or visitation. Mention the officiant’s name and any special instructions for attendees, such as dress code or items to bring.

Step 6: Proofread

Errors in spelling or grammar can detract from the solemnity and professionalism of the obituary. Enlist the help of a trusted friend or family member to review the obituary, as they might catch mistakes you have overlooked and verify the accuracy of the information.

Step 7: Publish

It is generally recommended to publish an obituary as soon as possible after the passing of a loved one, ideally within a few days. This allows enough time to inform friends, family, and the community about the death and provide details about the upcoming funeral or memorial services.

If there are any delays in finalizing service details, consider publishing a preliminary obituary with basic information and a follow-up once all details are confirmed.

► READ MORE: How to Write a Will: 5 Steps with Expert Attorney

Where to Publish an Obituary

Obituaries were traditionally published in newspapers; however, with the rise of digital platforms, online newspapers, dedicated obituary websites, and social media platforms like Facebook and Instagram have become increasingly popular.

Each platform has its advantages, depending on your needs and the audience you wish to reach.

Newspapers

• Cost: $100-$1,000, depending on the size of the publication and the length of the obituary
• Good for: Reaching a local or regional audience, particularly older generations who may rely on print media

Publishing an obituary in a newspaper ensures it reaches the community where the deceased lived or worked. It can be particularly effective for informing a broad audience and honoring the deceased within their local context.

Note that most newspapers require specific formatting and content length. They may also have rules about the type of photos you can use. For example, some newspapers charge by the word and have a minimum fee, making it essential to tailor the obituary content to fit both the budget and the publication requirements.

Funeral Home Websites

• Cost: Often included in the funeral package or a nominal fee
• Good for: Comprehensive information and ease of sharing

Funeral home websites provide a dedicated space for obituaries, including detailed information about the deceased, service details, and ways for people to send condolences. These platforms are user-friendly and allow for easy sharing among friends and family.

Online Obituary Websites

• Cost: Free to $200, depending on the website and additional features
• Good for: Wider reach and digital convenience

Dedicated obituary websites like Legacy.com or ObituariesHelp.org offer extensive reach and digital convenience. They often provide additional features such as guest books, photo galleries, and the ability to share the obituary on social media.

Social Media

• Cost: Free
• Good for: Instant sharing and engagement

Publishing an obituary on social media platforms like Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram allows instant sharing and engagement with a broad audience. It’s a convenient way to inform a large number of people quickly and gather condolences and memories.

Church or Community Bulletins

• Cost: Often free or a small donation
• Good for: Reaching community or religious group members

Obituaries published in church or community bulletins reach a specific audience that shares a common connection with the deceased. This method is personal and ensures that the obituary is seen by those who are most likely to attend services or offer support.

Company Newsletters

• Cost: Free
• Good for: Informing colleagues and professional contacts

If the deceased had a significant impact within a company or professional organization, publishing an obituary in a company newsletter can be a respectful way to inform colleagues and professional contacts, and honor their contributions.

Local Community Websites and Forums

• Cost: Free or a small fee
• Good for: Reaching local community members

Local community websites and forums often have sections for obituaries or announcements. This option ensures the obituary is seen by those within the local area, providing a platform for community members to offer support and condolences.

Obituary: An Example

Elly George, affectionately known to many as “Ell,” passed away peacefully at the age of 78 at her residence in Springfield on June 20, 2024, at 8:30 PM due to chronic heart disease.

Elly was born on November 3, 1943 in Springfield, where she was raised and became a beloved member of the community. She dedicated much of her life to working as a retail sales worker at the local mall, where her warm smile and cheerful demeanor made her a favorite among customers and colleagues alike. Elly’s passion for helping others was evident in her everyday interactions, always going above and beyond to make sure everyone felt welcomed and valued.

A lifelong fan of Benny Goodman, Elly’s love for music was infectious. She often reminisced about the times she would play his records and dance around her living room, inviting friends and family to join in the joy. Her home was filled with the sounds of swing and jazz, creating an atmosphere of warmth and happiness.

Elly’s generosity and kindness extended beyond her professional life. She was known for her impromptu gatherings, where she would cook her famous apple pie, a recipe passed down through generations. Her door was always open, and her home served as a sanctuary for many seeking comfort and companionship.

In her retirement, Elly found joy in volunteering at the local animal shelter, where she provided love and care to countless animals in need. Her compassion and dedication left a lasting impact on the community and the lives she touched.

Elly is survived by her two loving daughters, Anna (John) Smith and Lisa (Michael) Johnson, and 3 grandchildren. She is also survived by her sister, Margaret Brown, and her 4 nieces and nephews who cherished her dearly. She was preceded in death by her parents, John and Mary George, and her brother, Thomas George.

In honor of Elly’s memory, the family requests that donations be made to the Springfield Animal Shelter, a cause close to her heart.

“Music is life itself.” – Benny Goodman. This quote, one of Elly’s favorites, encapsulates the joy and vibrancy she brought into the lives of those around her.

A memorial service to celebrate Elly’s life will be held on June 28, 2024, at 2:00 PM at the Springfield Community Church. Reverend Susan Williams will officiate the service. Attendees are invited to wear colorful attire in celebration of Elly’s vibrant spirit. A reception will follow at her sister Margaret’s home, where friends and family can share their memories and stories of Elly.

Frequently Asked Questions

Can an obituary be used as a legal document?

No, an obituary cannot be used as a legal document. While obituaries are important for notifying the community and honoring the deceased, they do not hold any legal authority.

Legal documents, such as death certificates, are required for official purposes, including settling estates, claiming life insurance, and handling other legal affairs.

What is the difference between a eulogy and an obituary?

In terms of scope and detail, a eulogy is a more personal and emotional tribute, focusing on the character and memorable moments of the deceased’s life, often delivered at a funeral or memorial service. An obituary is the most concise, serving as a public notice of a person’s death with essential details and a brief overview of their life.

They also differ in purposes. Specifically, a eulogy is intended to honor and remember the deceased, providing comfort to mourners through personal memories and reflections. An obituary’s purpose is to inform the public about the person’s passing and provide details about funeral or memorial services.

What is the difference between a biography and an obituary?

While a biography gives a comprehensive look at a person’s life, an obituary captures the essence of the individual in a shorter format. Both serve to commemorate the person, but they do so in different ways and with different levels of detail.

A biography is a detailed account of a person’s life, covering their background, achievements, personal life, and impact on society. It aims to provide a deep understanding of the individual’s life and legacy, often for historical or educational purposes. Biographies can include interviews, stories, and thorough analysis.

On the other hand, an obituary is a brief public notice of a person’s death. It informs the community about the passing and provides key details such as birth and death dates, significant life milestones, and funeral or memorial service information. Obituaries are concise, focusing on honoring and remembering the deceased while offering essential information to the public.